


And on this night and in this light

by busywastinglife



Category: The 1975 (Band)
Genre: Casual Sex, Dirty Talk, F/M, Recreational Drug Use, Secret Relationship, non-established relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-27
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-23 13:41:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4878985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/busywastinglife/pseuds/busywastinglife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She loved the fantasies in a weird masochistic way, she even liked the way her stomach squeezed and palms sweated at the sight of George the morning after.</p><p>However none of the scenes she had imagined were like this - still on pills, with Matty in a three meter radius and George clearly making fun of her. It felt like a weird joke.</p><p>What didn't feel like a joke was two of George's fingers slowly sliding inside her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> standard disclaimer + the english is not my first language disclaimer + the please do not yell at me about the age difference, I do not condone it in real life, I really don't disclaimer
> 
> While I was editing it I realised I actually used the polish dialogue style but decided to leave it that way, as it is still understandable and easier for me to write.

It felt like falling into water. The silence filled her head up. It was always like this after gigs. The music, the screams - all the noises abruptly stop and you feel all alone in the darkness. And now darkness was dancing, whirling and swirling around her. And it was colorful and psychedelic. And she was pushing through the crowd, she couldn't breathe.

It was different that night. A whole new land for her when it comes to a the 1975 gig. For the first time she allowed herself to get lost in the crowd. Left her front photography pit, where she would usually stay, getting pictures for her constantly growing portfolio, left the sides of the stage, left the merch stand, where she would sometimes help her older brother with work. She let herself feel all of it properly. And like all of the things the 1975, it was overwhelming.

She finally found the right way and almost fell to her knees, blinded by the backstage lights. The black paint on the worn out wooden floor came into focus. Breathe in, breathe out. There was suddenly a shadow, someone hovering over her, someone pulling her up by her forearms, someone's fingers on her cheekbones, at first soft, delicate, unsure, but then pulling at her eyelids, someone's eyes peeking into hers.

\- L, I'm gonna fucking murder you - his voice was so deep and smooth like always, it felt like coming home, it felt so warm and calm and she splashed into his arms like she was a lukewarm liquid, not a solid, even though half-unconscious, human being person.

\- You can do whatever you want to me - she mumbled into his neck.

It wasn't that easy, she had to climb up on her tiptoes. He pulled her towards the showers and she reacted with surprised excitement. Then she actually looked at his face. He looked angry. It wasn't usual for George to be angry and that's why it was easily noticeable - he looked suspiciously sober. His eyes were alert and his jaw set.

-How many did you even take?

She shrugged and felt herself blush in shame. She took all of it.

-You weren't suppose to take all of them, Jesus, Lena, what is even wrong with you. Those are not candies. I didn't get them for you to have Tom murder me after you choke on your own vomit, 'lright?

-It's my only free night, I wanted to 'ave funnn - she whined.

George rolled his eyes, pushed her into the shower and without any warning turned on the water. She screamed and he closed the door, mumbling something about bringing her spare clothes.

Some time later she found them piled up on the tiled floor. She put them on and found him, immediately pushing her damp cheek into his sweaty neck. In response she received a groan and arms picking her up bridal style and then she was flying. She loved it.

They flew into a car and she cuddled up to him, causing more groans.

-Where're the others? - she slurred slightly but she thought it might have sounded cute.

So he might have wanted to fuck her.

She had been continuously getting her hopes up for ages now. George mostly didn't react, like he never saw her trying. And she was trying hard, so he must have seen. All she would ever get was a slight blush occasionally creeping up his neck with Matty giggling in the background. Then G would always see her brother and everything would go to shit.

-Stayed behind, meeting fans - his fingertips were softly stroking her cheek but he didn't seem to notice. She felt like purring.

-Oh, you didn't wanna stay? - she pouted, might had purred a bit.

-Tired and gotta take care of you. You hopeless child - there was a hopeless tenderness and affection in his tone, but she still hated him calling her that word. It was patronizing and at the same time like he was reminding himself not to touch.

Yes, she was barely seventeen. Yes, she wanted him to touch her.

They got to the hotel and he carried her all the way to their rooms and suddenly hesitated.

-You going to puke?

She shrugged a bit, half nodding her head, checking the ground, not sure why he was asking.

She chose well, as he took her with him and the angels in high heavens were singing as he placed her on the bed.

There were actually two of those, both overflowing with messy black clothing.

-I'm going to shower, k, darling? Don't hurt yourself, please. Don't really need Tom to murder me - he repeated.

He went to the bathroom, pulling his sweaty shirt over his head before even properly leaving the room. Left the bathroom door half open so that "she can call him if he's needed".

She needed him, he had no idea and she had this plan lurking beneath the rainbowy smoke still clouding up her thoughts.

She threw all the clothes and the duvet off the bed, wriggled a bit to get rid of her jeans and top, then crawled towards a mirror standing in front of her.

She looked at herself: smudged blackness under her eyes, freckles, dry lips. She fixed it up a bit. As much as she could. Made herself more rosy and pink.

She liked her eyes, though. She was starry eyed that night, like she absorbed all the beautiful light and energy the gig had to offer.

She got back on the bed and arranged herself artfully - let her ginger hair down and let it spill all over the mattress around her head like a fiery halo, slightly spread her legs. She ran her hand down her still slightly damp pale stomach, single freckles splattered around it, and then dipped just fingertips under the edge of her lace powder pink panties. They were quite obviously matching her bra. Trying to pull was a serious business.

Her head still spinning, no matter the shower that was suppose to sober her up, fingers tickling sensitive skin, she purred just as the bathroom door cracked open and George entered the room. She heard the footsteps abruptly stop, could see his silhouette from underneath of her half-closed eyelids.

-Lena? - his voice was deliciously raspy and unsure.

She did that to him!

Lena suddenly felt in power, like she was the privileged one in this situation.

-Would you mind putting on some clothes? Matty will be here soon and...

She arched an eyebrow, without even opening her eyes.

-Hm?

-You know what I mean- he finally dared to move, dropping the clothes he kept in his arms on Matty's bed, getting a bit closer to her.

She threw a quick glance at him. He was naked down to his waist and looking fresh. She loved it. How they matched.

\- Nah?

He must've known she was teasing him at this point, she just wondered if he knew why.

He leaned down, looking for something in his messy black bag on the floor.

-It looks a bit like I'm fucking you, darling.

That was her cue. She sat up.

-Would that be such a bad thing, though?

His head shot up and he giggled, a bit hysterically. He sure as hell was not sober. She looked straight at him, at his reddened eyes and dug her hand deeper into her underwear. He noticed the movement, his eyes helplessly following it as a blush rose on his cheeks.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, she felt his hand on hers, fingers tightly gripping her wrist, wrenching her hand out and pinning it to the bed.

-You're fucking hurting me, you idiot - she mewled, pulling her hand to herself and rubbing red finger-shaped marks that appeared on her skin.

He seemed to wake up from some sort of haze, horror on his face.

-Oh god, what are you doing to me. I'm so sorry... - he murmured into her skin, as he was suddenly leaning over her body on the bed, pulling her close to him, skin on skin.

Then he obviously froze, once again realising what's going on.

She saw the opportunity and pulled his leg in between hers, wrapping around him, kissing his neck.

-Nonononono - he protested tiredly, pinning her to the mattress, this time so hard she panted.

-We're not... You are not suppose to do that!

She could not move anymore, but she felt weirdly confident, seeing something in his eyes.

With this newly found confidence she moved her lips onto his and almost immediately opened her mouth.

Sometimes, she used to see him and Jessie kiss, always with something ugly boiling and turning in her stomach, making her sick. It tended to be sweet, mostly chaste pecks, but sometimes...

And at those moments she looked at them, aching, missing something she never had, missing what Jessie must had felt while kissing him.

And Lena got it now and George probably felt it too, judging from how he moved his hands to her sides, running up and down, digging in while they kissed. She gasped loudly into his mouth when he unhooked her bra and felt that long time coming blush from the roots of her hair all down her chest.

George had just closed his mouth around her nipple when some sort of tripping noise could be heard from just behind the door.

He didn't hesitate, but with a smooth, seemingly practised move, grabbed a shirt and duvet off the floor. She put the shirt on and wrapped herself in the duvet facing the wall. She could feel the wetness between her legs sticking her panties to her skin and it made her dizzy, but she didn't dare to move. She heard Matty trip through the threshold.

-Oi, who's that? - he slurred.

\- Lena - George sighed.

She felt slightly offended.

\- Staying here tonight.

\- Thought you finally got some.

\- Yeah, mate, sure - she literally knew he was doing his Matty Face. - Just don't tell Tom about it, want no trouble.

\- As long as you're not dicking her, mate - Matty laughed and she inhaled a bit too sharply.

He fortunately was all too drunk to notice. He threw himself onto his bed and almost immediately started to snore. She felt a wave of relief wash over her.

George fucked around with his bag for a while, went to bathroom for a bit and then the opposite end of the bed dipped.

He lied down and then she felt him curl around her under the duvet, both of his arms circling her waist and pulling her closer to him, her back to his front. She felt happy bubbles in the pit of her stomach and she leaned into it, purring, but then his right hand slipped under the edge of her shirt rucking it up to her armpits and his left hand went for her undies, cupping her through them.

She shivered.

\- What the hell are you doing, Matty's right next to us - Lena whispered with heat.

She didn't like the way her voice wavered. She was suddenly very aware of everything: sheets creasing under her sweaty thighs, the heat on her bum, back and back of her neck, radiating off George and especially his cold fingers slipping under the last layer of material.

-You don't want me now? You want me to stop? - he giggled into her ear. - I can stop and we'll just forget about it.

She shushed him, scared that Matty might hear them and choked out a moan as he circled his finger. It was blissfully frightening - her wetness on George's long fingers.

It's not like she didn't dream about it, partly against her will, on most nights on the tour bus.

She was lucky enough to be with Tom on the same bus as the band was. She was happy that she could casually spend most of her time with the guy she fancied, but sleeping in a bunk under George's and opposite of Matty's one could be quite a rollercoaster.

They would often drag themselves to beds in the wee morning hours with a wave of smelly smoke remains. Matty had an annoying tendency for stumbling out of his bunk to puke in the tiny toilet and George giggled at him like an absolute twat.

There were also times when George would sneak her red vines, vodka or puppies or, like today, some pills.

But once in a while, deep into a dark night, she would hear him shift above her, as his breath fastened and turned frantic.

That was when her fantasies got particularly vivid. When it happened for the first time, she was reluctant - still trying to convince herself it would be stupid to maintain a crush on an older sort-of-co-worker who, at the time, was still in a relationship.

But when she heard him gasp, she couldn't stop the images flooding her mind - George above her, but literally above her, nothing separating them, flushed and breathing heavily, coming with that gasp she heard so clearly, striping her thighs with cum and then rubbing it in with fascination, scooping a bit on his finger, spreading her lips and stroking her clit, mixing the whiteness with her own juices and-

She had felt her face burn, but at the same her muscles had contorted in pleasure and she had known it was gonna be like that from that moment.

She loved the fantasies in a weird masochistic way, she even liked the way her stomach squeezed and palms sweated at the sight of George the morning after.

However none of the scenes she had imagined were like this - still on pills, with Matty in a three meter radius and George clearly making fun of her. It felt like a weird joke.

What didn't feel like a joke was two of George's fingers slowly sliding inside her.

-Baby, answer me, please - he murmured into her neck and she actually managed to feel angry at how cocky and arrogant he sounded.

-You prick, you know I- she was cut off abruptly as he stretched his fingers out inside her to the point it was quite painful. She almost couldn't breathe and she definitely couldn't stop the moan that got out of her.

-If I knew, I wouldn't ask, would I, love? - he giggled, somehow still cute while moving his fingers in and out of her, his thumb circling her clit at the same time.

That's when she started to whimper and felt George's other hand, to that moment resting on her hip, quickly run up her body. His fingers lingered over her throat, closed around it for a moment and moved up to her mouth. He pushed them inside her lips, pressing down on her tongue.

-Suck, sweetie.

She obeyed and he kissed her shoulder in praise.

-Here's the deal, I'm going to be real nice to you now... - he started rubbing her clit, finally at a satisfying paste.

\- But you gotta be nice for me later.

Lena nodded quickly and he pulled her even closer and kept moving his hand until her thighs quivered, she bit on the flesh in her mouth hard enough to draw blood and finally came.

He wiped his wet fingers on her stomach, obviously.

 

***

 

She woke up with her head pounding and her whole body overheated and sweaty. The spot behind her was still warm and she could hear the water running in the bathroom.

Matty was nowhere to be seen and most of his clothes were already stuffed into his bag.

The phone on the nightstand buzzed.

She hesitated, then grabbed it and tapped the code in. S

he knew it from the countless number of times she had to look for it when George couldn't find it and was lying on the floor completely high and moaning or when he would browse through instagram on backstage couches next to her.

It unlocked and a new message from Matty popped up. It s

aid "Hurryyyy" and was a follow up to "Go down, breakkie".

George replied "Mhmm" to that previous one.

She felt hazy, but it still surprised her, when she got up and tiptoed towards the bathroom door. It didn't even creak when she was slowly opening it.

 He was standing there, his hair already soaked, water running down his back.

That was when she got a bit awestruck. Should she get rid of her shirt, open the glass door and go for it? But what was it exactly? Her lack of experience was burning fiery red on her cheeks.

He must've somehow sensed her presence, because he turned around and stared at her, visibly startled.

-Lena? D'you need something?

She m a d e herself shrug and give him a crooked smile.

However forced her confidence was, it must have been convincing and she once again felt powerful.

He was standing there, frozen, shower still on, water dripping into his tired eyes, looking surprisingly scared for 6'4" guy in front of moderately sized, half naked girl.

She soon got herself completely naked and when her, no, actually h i s, shirt fell on the floor, he finally woke up and with his left hand hovering over his dick, raised the right one in a pleading gesture.

-Lena, stop.

-You want me to stop? - she mimicked his words from the night before and took two steps forward, so she was inches away from the steamy glass surface.

-Yes, I do- he cut himself off, because her face fell immediately at these words. -You know what I mean, I don't think I even can do this legally in this state...- he mostly ignored her eyeroll.

\- And I definitely shouldn't okay? Last night was wrong, it was a mistake, and I'm sorry, babe...

She shook her head with annoyance and finally opened the door and stepped in. George took a quick step backwards, which was very convenient as she fell to her knees.

-Waitwaitwait, Jesus, kiddo - George raised his hands in horror, probably not aware that he uncovered his dick and that it was now on the level of her face.

-You sure you wanna say I'm a child now? - she said but her voice shook, losing its sarcastic edge. Her cheeks felt really warm and she was very aware of first droplets sliding down her naked body and the cold floor under her knees.

Suddenly, she felt his hand on her cheek, fingers stroking up and down. His thumb traced her lips and hesitantly slipped inside her mouth. She sucked on it, slowly moving her tongue against it. She looked up to see him looking down at her with fascination, calculating. His fingers fluttered against her jaw.

\- You're gonna choke me again? - she purred.

Something flashed in his eyes, but he retracted, shook his head and gestured for her to get up.

-Come on, baby.

She was surprised, but didn't question it, got up and swayed a bit on her legs, leaned on him, hands on his elbows to stable herself, finally touching him.

His voice was quiet and husky when he spoke to her.

-Turn around and lean forward with, like, your elbows on the glass, hm

She shivered and did so.

He turned the water flow down a bit and she could hear his heavy breath perfectly

She was cold on the outside, boiling hot on the inside, completely terrified and it felt so, so good.

His right hand gripped her side, long fingers splayed along her ribs, pushing in hard enough to bruise. Her skin was tingling with anticipation.

And, and nothing really happened.

George's hand on her side shook a bit and it seemed like his breath picked up, in synth with some faint, slick sound in the background.

-George? - her voice sounded unsure. She w a s unsure, unsure of what she was actually waiting for.

\- Shh - he said, slightly pushing her forward and suddenly a touch of something warm and damp caught her off guard. She sharply breathed in as the sensation disappeared and came again. This time she could clearly feel him sliding against her, precum smearing on her buttcheek.

-F-fuck - she finally breathed out.

He plastered himself to her back. It was all overwhelming, his wet torso, hand skidding from her ribs to her breasts, other one guiding his dick in between her cheeks, down, against her asshole, perineum and back up. He mouthed at her neck softly and she shut her eyes closed so hard she saw flickers behind her closed eyelids.

She lost the track of time with his body all pressed against her, burning hot, making it hard to focus on anything, so couldn't tell how much time had passed before he shook just a tiniest bit against her back and came. She was fully aware of his load splattering on her bottom.

He pulled away and it suddenly got very quiet.

She couldn't move, she could barely breathe, she was just standing there, bent over, with cum drying on her skin. She heard him swallow, absurdly loud in the overwhelming silence.

His hands disappeared, just to clasp out of nowhere around her knees. It was probably meant to keep her up and stable, but didn't help much, when her legs gave up with the first touch of his tongue on her buttcheek. Hot embarrassment in her stomach was blissful, made her both numb and shaky. He was licking his own cum straight off her skin.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -You guys really have loads of branded smoking merch - she motioned to the white logos on both the skins and the lighter. George just laughed and started prepping the joint.  
> Lena couldn't help staring at his mouth when he took the first hit - his cheeks hollowed, his eyes closed in focus. She motioned for him to give her the joint when he breathed out but he shook his head and took another hit ignoring her whine. Suddenly his hand found its way to the side of her face and he pulled her down till her mouth was directly above his and the smoke flew between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, it's going to get more and more ridiculous. I hope you enjoy it, though.

Hotel's main restaurant was flooded with bright, annoying kind of morning sunlight. She looked around before spotting the group. They were all sitting together: few crew members, her brother amongst them, Waughy, Ross and Matty leaning dramatically on George's shoulder. She grabbed a cup of coffee and dropped down on the only free chair, obviously next to George.

Tom glanced at her still damp hair and raised an eyebrow.

-Shouldn't have washed your hair, we're leaving in a sec...

-So? - she demanded, overly aware of how childish it sounded.

-You'll get sick and mum will blame it all on me.

-Yeah, he's right - George cackled. - Better don't make your brother mad.

Tom nodded with a laugh, patted his shoulder in that obnoxious bro manner she had to constantly witness on this tour and left, muttering something about checking on the equipment.

-Sooo...- Matty said, with a challenging raise of an eyebrow. - From what I've seen, you had quite some fun yesterday, Lena.

All of them laughed, making her skin crawl.

-And from what I've seen, Matty, darling, you had quite some fun on this tour - she spat, making the boys laugh again. Matty uttered a lopsided smile, but George stayed quiet.

-Yeah, yeah, the difference is I don't have to take care of him afterwards - George muttered.

-Take care? Oh, it must have been such a burden to you.

Lena leaned over towards him. Everyone else lost interest in their exchange, it was just Lena, George's eyes on her and her foot wandering up his leg.

-So sorry, I know you had better things to do...

Her foot was on his thigh now, which required her to stay in this ridiculous pose - the way they were sitting was not perfect for pulling this stunt but it seemed worth it to her. George made her do truly stupid things.

-Like you know, smoking up...

Her foot wandered up between his thighs.

-But the thing is, you didn't have to do it.

Abruptly, he took a hold of her foot, pushing it off his bulge and to the ground and pulled his chair close to her, just a table leg separating them.

-No, the thing is, sometimes the situation makes us act in a certain way.

His fingers circled around her entire thigh and clenched.

-And you can really be blamed, can you?

-Do you want milk?

-What? -Lena snapped out of her haze.

-Milk? With your coffee? - Matty raised a judgemental eyebrow.

***

After Lena slipped out of George's grasp and excused herself to get ready, the day went the usual way - they stuffed themselves into the bus and after a few hours of playstation/attempting to read/hibernation, arrived at the night's venue.

There were about two hours left before showtime and Lena was nodding off on the backstage's couch, browsing through her camera.

She was pretty knackered after the previous night and pretty nervous after the morning. There was just a tiny bit of tour left but she was afraid of how awkward it could get. She could ask to swap places with someone from the other bus and avoid band's room at backstages but it would just raise questions she didn't need. The realisation of how stupid her actions were was just sinking in, she felt embarassed and she was repeating in her head that she would get rid of her stupid crush and focus on her work how she was supposed to and-

Her promises abruptly stopped when George entered the room - in all his tall glory, pulling his top up to wipe sweat off of his face. He flopped down on the carpet, directly in front of Lena.

-Fuck, I'm dying - he exclaimed.

-What were you even doing? - she tried to sound nonchalant but she knew it was a lost  battle. She was tense and it definitely was a visible kind of tense - complete with a straight back and legs pulled tightly together.

-We went for a work out, me and Matty. Went running - he groaned, leaning towards her. He propped his arm on her knee and pillowed his head there.

-You're shitting me - she deadpanned.

-Wha? - George sounded totally offended but he had no leg to stand on.

-There's no fucking way he went running with his eternal hungover and all workout you ever do is like random push-ups - Lena rolled her eyes and didn't mention that watching him do random push-ups on the tourbus was her favourite pastime. -You just jogged around the car park, innit?

-Yeah babe, know me so well - his head came back to its spot on her knees and his messy hair tickled her bare skin below the line of her skirt.

-But, you know what? I've got weed.

-Of course you do.

She always acted like George's predictability was annoying to her but if she was to be honest with herself - it was reassuring, it was a part of the charm and she would never want him to change, to destroy the vision she had built on all of the precious memories of this tour. She liked him annoying her.

-You always say shit like that and then want me to share.

-Of course I do - she tentatively threaded her fingers through the mess of his hair as he laid out a baggy of weed, a pack of papers, a crumbled pack of tobacco and a lighter.

-You guys really have loads of branded smoking merch - she motioned to the white logos on both the skins and the lighter. George just laughed and started prepping the joint.

Lena couldn't help staring at his mouth when he took the first hit - his cheeks hollowed, his eyes closed in focus. She motioned for him to give her the joint when he breathed out but he shook his head and took another hit ignoring her whine. Suddenly his hand found its way to the side of her face and he pulled her down till her mouth was directly above his and the smoke flew between them. She gasped in surprise, choked a bit and George laughed really softly, just a tiny whisper of laughter and his lips brushed hers. She still felt the touch as she leaned back, the joint finally in her hand. She could sense he was watching her as she smoked her round.

As the joint slowly went back and forth George started shifting to a new position facing her. His warm cheek was pressed into the inside of the lower, getting close to middle, part of her thigh, his right arm circled around her ankle.

-You're heating up my thigh, aw - she slid a bit lower on the couch.

-Want me to heat up something else? - he winked obnoxiously. She snorted.

-Sure, some munchies would be nice.

He nodded, like he agreed and lazily turned his head to the side, nuzzling further into her thigh. He hesitated and bit down on the flesh.

-Ouch - Lena whined softly. - What are you doing?

\- Munching - he murmured and licked over the pink bitemark. She took a heavy breath and spread her legs involuntarily. There was this buzzing sensation just underneath the skin of her thighs and scalp - the nervous excitement, start of arousal, a million tiny ants and bees running around and making her feel a bit too warm.

-George...- she prompted. He didn't react, too busy studying the tooth dents on her skin. -George!

He finally looked up, askingly. His fingers were stroking the mark like he couldn't let it go.

-Where are the boys?- she asked, her eyes turning to the door.

-No idea, why?

-I feel they're gonna be back anytime - she tried to pull up to the proper sitting position, but his hand sliding up her thigh stopped her.

-Come on, you're being paranoid. Why would they even come here. Ross and Hann both have their Skype dates and Matty is probably wine shopping or some shit like that. Yeah?

Tips of his fingers were right on the junction between her thigh and hip and his thumb was touching the edge of her underwear. She wasn't protesting, nothing was going to be proper about this afternoon.

-You're probably right... - she gave up, with full awareness.

-I am - he pressed a soft kiss to her thigh. -Is it okay?

Both of his hands were rested on her thighs by then. He was looking at her with furrowed eyebrows, worry peaking through the haziness of his half-closed eyes.

She simply nodded and slowly pulled her leg up, hooking it over his shoulder.

Her lip trembled when he was kissing a line up her thigh, a shadow of stubble scratching her skin. She felt his breath on herself just before he opened his mouth and gave the front of her white cotton panties a wide lick. The fabric stuck to her already damp pubic hair. Her head was thrown back and all she could see was the dizzy darkness of the insides of her eyelids but she could feel his thumb stroke the wet patch. Then he hooked his finger under the edge and pulled the material, baring her cunt. His breath now directly on her hot skin was a bit too much. Her feet jerked uncontrollably. She kicked off her ballet flats and as they landed on the carpet she put her now bare foot on his shoulder. He looked flushed and distracted and the prettiest she's ever seen him.

-I wanna taste you - he rubbed his thumb where his hand was resting on her knee. -Please.

She managed to swallow a moan.

-Take off your shirt.

He did what she wanted him to. Immediately.

She got back to her previous position, enjoying the touch of even more of his skin on hers.

He leaned in again, this time with confidence and gave a flick of tongue to her lips. She whimpered, grateful that he was gripping her legs, holding them open. But then he let go of her ankles, his hand on the lips, spread them open and went down straight on her clit.

His back and shoulders were radiating heat onto her ankles. This sensation and the feeling of him licking up into her pussy made her insides melt. She huffed out a breath of annoyance when he pulled away once again.

-You taste so sweet, baby - George licked his lips. The feverish shine in his eyes frightened her. - I could taste you forever.

She reached down and rubbed her clit, let the mess of her fluids and his saliva wet her fingers and then she outstretched her hand, let him take her fingers into his mouth, lick between them.

-Good boy.

They both snorted. She raised her eyebrow, though and grabbed his hair, manhandling his head back between her thighs.

He was so good and eager and messy at the same time. Her breath got deeper with every broad stroke of his tongue, every nip to her thigh leaving a purplish pattern she couldn't wait to press on later. She almost didn't notice him getting rid of her useless, soaked underwear. She just noted it away in her memory to panic over later, when she would have more time to overthink every move and motive behind it.

In exchange for the bruises, she left pink scratches down his shoulder blades. Also, she might had kicked his back a few times. Accidentally, but he was to blame.

Her climax wasn't a surprise, it was honestly well-earned. However, George didn't get to receive a proper praise for his work.

When the orgasm came, she pressed down on the couch quite rapidly, causing it to shake.

Her beloved camera, that she abandoned on the couch after George came, tumbled down to the floor with an empty thump. Lena's breath caught in her throat. She hurried to examine the device lying on the carpet. It seemed undamaged but her hands were already sweaty.

-It took like two years worth of my savings to buy it - she sputtered.

George blinked slowly, like he was surprised by her tone and the whole outburst. He was wet all around his mouth.

-Oh god, what the hell am I doing - Lena groaned.

Just as she said this, the door flew open.

-I've been looking for you for the past fifteen minutes, Lena. It's getting annoying.

-What? - she asked, still on the floor, putting her legs together in panic.

Out of corner of her eye she saw George struggling to fit something white into his tight jeans pocket. His left hand was hanging awkwardly over his crotch as he sat down on the couch.

-Jesus, brat, you keep getting lost - Tom finally passed the threshold. - You promised Jamie some photos of the crowd before the show remember?

-Not to mention... - he stopped to give George a bewildered look. - Bro, is it really that hot in here?

Lena unwillingly turned her head to look at him. He was still half-naked, his top still abandoned on the floor, somewhere between her shoes.

She quickly grabbed them, praying for no more dumb questions.

She heard George snicker. He didn't offer Tom any answers. Her brother just decided to go with it.

-Whatever. Come, sis, you were suppose to be in the photographer pit ages ago.

Lena hurried after him and didn't look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I'd appreciate some feedback!  
> Here's [my blog](http://ministryofsillywords.tumblr.com/) if you'd like to talk about the fic or just Matty and George being in love and how great the new aesthetic is gonna look live.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What Lena always noticed was that George was not talkative in the way Matty was - always spilling his guts into lap of anyone who was willing to listen. He was not like Ross, Hann or John - who would stay reserved or even completely quiet during interviews, but didn't mind sharing their thoughts after a few drinks amongst friends.
> 
> George kept his narrative reserved to weed-driven gibberish, and the only way to see him be someone other than either chill George or focused, hard-working George was to be Matty (of which she was ashamedly aware because of listening in to their conversations numerous times) or to see him play live. When he hit the drums it seemed like he let it all out and felt free to do it. Which was probably the cause of all the weird faces he pulled.
> 
> And which was the cause of the worst thing - Lena really liked that she made him feel that way. Like he was boiling inside, threatening to spill.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today is St Nicholas Day, so you're getting a chapter.  
> Sorry for the wait.  
> Disclaimers as usual :)

She maintained focus for the entire show with some tiny breaks caused by flashes of white peeking over the edge of George’s back pocket when he walked around the stage, droplets of sweat sliding down his back and chest and random cold blows of air flapping her skirt and giving her chills.

Actually, no, the thing was - her underwear wasn't where it was supposed to be - namely, on her ass. At that time, it was stuffed into the back pocket of George's trousers, at moments half-out of it. She had this short frilly skirt on, very handy when she had been getting head, not that handy afterwards. She didn't want to flash the bodyguards and front barrier girls, she definitely didn't want the techs lingering on the sides of the stage and the rest of the band to know that she was running around with no underwear on.

But George knew. He was smirking every time he looked at her. And he looked a lot.

Smirk was one of  George's two widest smiles - complete with his eyes crinkling and his uneven teeth showing. These two smiles were reserved for special occasions - for when he was really mischievous, a little out of his full-chill zone and for when he was blissfully happy, giddy with it. Lena knew it from the few times she saw it - once at the album launch party Tom dragged her, the hopeless fangirl, to and from the few times she and Jessie happened to both be visiting on tour at the same time.

The problem was, as she was thinking about it, all of the initial anger she might have felt left her and all she could think about was how much she wanted the loved up, hopeful excitement in her stomach to stay there and gradually bloom into something greater. Then came fear.

***

The tourbus gave her a feeling of false safety. They haven't managed to pull off something dumb in there yet. Always too many people in such small space, too risky. But it was not like they had been doing this thing for a long time.

She was chugging on a water bottle when she felt someone's hand on her butt. The truth was, there was even no need for her to turn around and check, but when she saw him, she still choked on the liquid. He reached to softly stroke her throat, his other hand somehow still on her ass.

-You look cute when you choke.

She send him an incredulous look.

-I can't believe you just said that.

He gave her a light pat and drew back with hurry as soft steps in the corridor were quickly followed by Ross appearing in the kitchenette.

-Have you seen my phone anywhere? - he addressed them and thoughtfully scratched his beard with his eyebrows furrowed.

They both shook their heads in unison and he left. But Lena was done with the situation. Something as insignificant as Ross dropping by to look for his phone made her stomach clench. She grabbed her water bottle and without a word stomped off to the back lounge of the bus. He followed her and plopped down next to where she curled up on the sofa by the window.

-I'm sensing a pattern here - George laughed. Lena just raised her eyebrow, turning to him.

-People always walking in on us - he elaborated with a smirk. -We can never finish properly, a bit sad.

-As far as I remember you did finish - she couldn't stop the blush creeping up her face. - It's just me who never gets anything good out of it. Just the opposite.

George dropped his phone in his lap, an incredulous look on his face.

-Firstly, that is not true...- he pressed and her blush deepened. -Secondly, what does it even mean?

\- I mean maybe we should stop. Maybe you should find someone else to have your fun with, someone with whom you won't have to sneak around.

-What? - he raised his voice which was not the usual for him. At all. It did surprise her and ironically the first thing she did was sneak a quick glance around the lounge to see if they were definitely alone.

-You were the one who started it - the muscles in his arms flexed but he didn't do any move in her direction, he just grabbed at nothing, closed his fist like he just needed to. Like he just needed his sticks and his drumset.

What Lena always noticed was that George was not talkative in the way Matty was - always spilling his guts into lap of anyone who was willing to listen. He was not like Ross, Hann or John - who would stay reserved or even completely quiet during interviews, but didn't mind sharing their thoughts after a few drinks amongst friends.

George kept his narrative reserved to weed-driven gibberish, and the only way to see him be someone other than either chill George or focused, hard-working George was to be Matty (of which she was ashamedly aware because of listening in to their conversations numerous times) or to see him play live. When he hit the drums it seemed like he let it all out and felt free to do it. Which was probably the cause of all the weird faces he pulled.

And which was the cause of the worst thing - Lena really liked that she made him feel that way. Like he was boiling inside, threatening to spill.

She shook her head, snapped out of just another stupid dream.

\- I'm seventeen, you should finally try to see that.

-That's what I've been telling you, but I guess not listening is just a part of your act.

He left, making a move with his arms like he wanted to slam closed the door that wasn't there. Instead, he just tensed and hurried off to the front of the bus.

Lena decided to sulk leaning on the narrow, shaky windowsill. The next few hours, spent on overthinking everything and getting nostalgic about the ending tour, turned her sniffy and weepy. That's what made Matty pout emphatically when he found her.

-Babe, what's wrong?

Lena shook her head, swiping the back of her hand over her cheeks and nose.

-Nothing - she shrugged, her voice raspy. - It's just that the tour is ending…

-Aww, babe, you're gonna miss us?

He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and nuzzled into her neck, tickling her. She giggled.

-Of course you will, how could you not.

-Of course I will, even though you're an ass - she leaned back into his chest comfortably, all of sudden feeling kind of better.

-Only when it suits the situation - he pointedly ignored her snort and laced hands he rested on her stomach. -Oi, do you know what's up with George?

Lena slowly, forcibly inhaled and exhaled, not feeling kind of better anymore. Cars, barriers and sky were one grey blur passing behind the window but it was not going to swallow her and she was still stuck there with Matty wrapped around her, waiting for an answer.

-Aren't you the one that should know this?

-Yeah, the thing is I know something’s wrong, he just won't tell me what it is - he stroked his fingers up and down her forearm mindlessly. -And you two seem to hang out a lot…

-Yeah? -asked Lena, swallowing.

-Yeah, you two seemed pretty cozy cuddled up back then.

Her head involuntarily jerked up from where it was resting on his chest.

-When you had that adventure on pills? Do you even remember? - he laughed.

-Yeah - she breathed.

-Well, you should, considering your major crush on him.

Lena groaned mentally. And probably verbally, too.

-My what?

-Don't blush, it's adorable, it is - he pressed a kiss to the nape of her neck. - We could see, you'd look at him at the rehearsals a lot and blush a lot.

He was laughing at her but in this light, non-teasing, non-typical-matty way. It put her at ease, she relaxed. It's impossible he knew anything. And it wouldn't change.

If George touched her like this, she wouldn't be able to keep calm, but with Matt it was different - not only because of her feelings for George but in general, this kind of behavior meant something different with Matty.

It was clearly visible in the way they approached girls, something she's learnt throughout the tour. When George embraced the girls with his large arm and smirked around his cigarette, Matty kissed them on their mouths. When George whispered out subtly dirty compliments, what Matty did could only be described as dirty talk.

Because of that, when she felt Matty’s hand slipping under her loose t-shirt, she just giggled.

-You're really fucking cold, you bastard.

-No way - he drawled, putting his mouth against her neck. -But you're so warm, Lena, share some of that.

His fingers were tracing the underwire of her bra by then.

-It's all because you're so skinny- she whined as goosebumps formed on her skin under his ice-cold touch.

-Not like George, eh?

-Wha…?

-He's so big, innit? All pretty and muscly, could do anything to you if he wanted. I know you're into that - he smirked.

He pulled her harder to himself, tightening his grip on her waist. She turned around in his embrace to face him.

-Are we still talking about what I like?

And because this tour has been a cliche right from the beginning, George decided to enter the room at this exact moment.

All three of them stopped right in their tracks.

Matty stopped and he seemed to fully understand what Lena meant. Judging from his expression, it hit way too close to home. He stayed like this, because he saw George.

Lena stopped because Matty didn't react to her half-joke the way she thought he would and it was… interesting. Definitely put some things into perspective.

She stayed like this because she saw George, saw his face, hand clenched around his paper coffee cup and she could see the word ‘slut’ forming in his head. Which was saying something about how idealized her view of George was, even too idealized for her to fully believe in it.

-Well… - George said, swirling his cup around mindlessly. -I’ll leave you two to it - he nodded to himself and left.

-Life is ironic - Matty said. She felt the need to slap him.

***

The backstage before the last show was a bit of a mess. Everyone seemed to be just running around in disbelief that they'd no longer have to deal with deafening crowds, smelly shower rooms and cramped bunks. Of course, there was hint of sadness, but quite honestly, the long-awaited break was welcomed with relief.

Certainly for Lena, who guiltily realised that she would lose the excuse of obsessing over George  and have to focus on her actual job. She could really start right away, as he wasn't even talking to her. Or to Matty, for that matter. She could try to get in a really good form for London and all the gigs she had lined up later that autumn. This tour was a great opportunity, but her portfolio needed some diversity.

Tom caught her, as he was running by with equipment piled up in his arms. Lena groaned inwardly. She was a lazy girl and a bratty little sister, there was no way to hide it. She was not planning on carrying heavy stuff without getting paid for it. She looked around but there was nowhere to hide. He put the case on the ground and put a hand on her arm.

-Erm, there is a problem. Kind of.

She didn’t answer, waiting for him to elaborate.

-You remember my mate, Robbie?- Tom nervously rubbed on the back of his neck with his left hand, the other one still heavy on her shoulder. -Well, he was suppose to tour with this one band for the next few months, but the idiot broke his arm, completely out of nowhere and he needs some time to recover and well, the thing is…

\- Stop rambling, have some mercy - Lena groaned.

-He needs someone to fill in for him and only I can do it…

Lena furrowed her eyebrows.

-Wait, wait… No, you can’t! - she took a step back, and angrily shrugged his hand off of herself.

-Lena, listen, he’s a good lad…- he started but Lena interrupted him once again.

-You know that I have gigs in London! Thats was gonna be my portfolio material, so that I can send out some applications soon!

-Who’s gonna help him if I don’t?

-Who’s gonna stay with me if you don’t? You act like you don’t know mum and like you think she would ever allow it

He sighed deeply and gave her a tired look that just riled her up.

-I’ll try to figure something out, okay? I just wanted to prepare you for disappointment if that will be the case.

-Yeah, yeah, like always - she snickered.

-Don't be fucking rude, young lady -  Tom said and he was gone.

If that was suppose to be a nice end to the tour, it didn't work out like she thought it would. She did in fact have some mixed feelings about the tour, but she had some specific plans for that day. The plans consisted of taking great pictures at the last show and then having the kind of fun she would regret later at the after-party. But she was suppose to be calm - calm because of her further plans - staying at Tom’s shitty London flat and attending some local shows of the autumn tours with her photo press pass in hand. And those plans would probably go to shit in this situation. The shitty localisation of Tom’s shitty flat, their mother's paranoia and a number of other things wouldn't allow her to stay in London by herself. Which automatically meant going home.

The show went just fine, but her sour face earned her some raised eyebrows, when she entered the after-party and instantly reached for a nearest liquor bottle. She didn't care, not really.

Matty and George apparently got an apartment of two adjoining bedrooms at the hotel for the occasion. It wasn't the most sensible of decisions to just stuff all of the band members, roadies, label guys and seemingly random people off the gig guest list into such relatively small space, but nobody expected them to be sensible. When she got there the room was already filled with smoke and people. Not an unusual view.

As she put the bottle down after taking a generous swig, Matty caught her eye and beckoned her over with a drunk smile. She obliged, happy that she wouldn't have to awkwardly look for someone to hang with. As George was still not talking to her and he was all she ever wanted to hang with.

She perched on Matty’s lap, took his cig out of his hand and sucked on it slowly.

-You can smoke in here? - she questioned him with a raised eyebrow, her eyes sliding from his face to smoke floating from her mouth up to the ceiling.

-Well, we didn't exactly ask, but there's no actual sign saying that we can't, is there?

She shrugged and wrapped a loose arm around his neck and let him get back to his previous conversation. She listened in idly, not bothering to take part in it. She nicked Matty’s drink, though. It was disgusting, heavy with vodka. Matty couldn't mix drinks for shit when he was drunk.

She looked around. It was a normal party, really - people just drinking, smoking, talking about nothing over the sound of music. That, with a small addition of the weird air of excitement that always appeared when The 1975 did and the bitter-sweetness of something great ending.

She stopped. George was staring at her. He was in the corner with some people, half-leaning on the wall, his eyes on her. There was something really ugly and angry in them. She knew that look a bit too well, but it was new - she never saw it on George before. She got to her feet and left Matty behind her. He called out to her, but she didn't hear. She heard buzzing in her ears.

She opened her mouth when she was at arm’s length away from George, but nothing came out. She took about three calming breaths.

-You have a problem?

-Me? - he shrugged. His eyes went blank, but on the other head he got a really stubborn, childish look on his face.

-You do. And we're gonna talk about it- she smiled viciously. -I'm going to toilet. You're going to go in there in a minute and we’re gonna talk about it. Don't roll your eyes.

He did exactly what he said. A minute after she entered the bathroom, he appeared. He locked the door and leaned on it with his arms down, hands in his pockets.

She hopped off the counter.

-You think I'm a slut, don't deny it. I know you had that thought, it doesn't matter you would never say it, it's the thought that counts.

Her voice was shaking a bit more than she had thought it would when she had put these words together in her head. And he just looked at her calmly, intimidating and infuriating at once.

-But the thing is... - she picked up again. - I'm not yours, you have no right. You know how Matty is - she ignored his clearly involuntary wince and carried on. - You know, you have no reason to be jealous.

He didn't interrupt, listened with focus. When she finished he took a step forward, hands still in his pockets.

-You wanna know what I really think? You don't really care if I thought about you in that way, because you know all of these things, you know it would be unfair and you would have the right to feel hurt, I would be in the wrong.

He paused to swallow and she suddenly felt her stomach clench deliciously, with nervous anticipation.

-I think you want me to call you that. Out loud. You love the fucking chase. You struggle, but it excites you. You would love Matty or whoever else to hear me call you that and you would get wet wondering if they know it's you I was with.

His voice was just a bit above a whisper, but his words sounded so loud in her head. She felt embarrassment wash all over her. It felt amazing.

-What do you want? - she felt drunker than she was, and it suddenly seemed like a really important question to ask.

He slowly crossed his arms over his chest and her gaze slid down them with appreciation.

-I really want to spank you. You make me so angry and I don't get why. I just want to bend you over my lap and give you what you want. Call you names and pull that skirt up. See if you finally found your underwear. Make you blush somewhere else than usual - out of nowhere he smiled. - You're such a cute little ginger, always blushing.

-Just do it then -she was right in front of him, centimeters away before she knew it. He seemed taken aback. He tried to get a grip on her forearms but his fingers just slipped right up as she hooked them around his neck and touched her lips to it. He seemed to slowly but surely melt in her embrace, with her licking and biting his skin. She loved the way it pinked, reddened and finally purpled up in her wake. She might had acted like she was not his but it didn't mean she wouldn't claim him.

She pulled away only when the effect satisfied her and looked up at him with shiny eyes.

-Fuck me.

He blinked.

-Lena, no.

She hesitated and palmed his dick through the material of his trousers. He was fully hard, there was no mistaking. He caught her hand in his and guided it to his mouth to kiss it softly.

-Can't you see that this is crazy? We're both wasted, locked in a bathroom... Everything I just said? Come on, we have our fantasies but the reality - we both wouldn't want Tom to know. We would lose a good tech, you would lose all of your jobs, it would just be dumb. And about the other stuff... - he rubbed his face in apparent distress. - Shit, you're still fucking 17, no matter what I do and say and...

She yanked her hand out of his grasp in anger.

-Then why do this, why say all of this and push me away, so sensible all of sudden - she shivered and first tears prickled in the corners of her eyes.

He shrugged sheepishly.

-You'll be gone tomorrow and I couldn't resist you. Never could.

-Fuckfuckfuck - she racked her fingers through her messy her and felt her eyes leak as her vision went blurry. She had to escape this damned situation. She went on autopilot - practically run, just heard doors slam behind her and people's worried voices but soon enough she hit the bed. She fell asleep feeling shaky and embarrassed, this time in a bad way.

***

She wasn't fully awake when they got to the airport the next day. She floated through all the procedures in a haze of her hungover. She got her hands on a frozen coffee as fast as she could, and for the remaining wait time she focused on the sensation of the numbing burn the cold cup gave to her fingertips. She managed to avoid anyone. She didn't think they would bother her anyway, most of them in the exact state she was in, but she’d rather stay safe. She stayed clear of the crew, the band, the boy, especially the boy. That's who he was, just a boy - she told herself. It wasn't that hard anyway, keeping herself from him for the last time, just that one day. The she would, unfortunately but surely, go home.

The relief almost overflowed the disappointment and she was about mad at herself for this. She should prefer staying in London, even for the risk of bumping into George at events and lad hangouts at her brother's, over having a boring and safe holidays at home - editing the pictures she took on tour. And sure, she probably would meet him in the future and she should hope for it - for such great opportunities The 1975 always gave her. But she thought she would have grown out of this crush by then, she would have forgotten the grip he could get on her thighs and throat and all of it

But- but for now it was the end.

She threw out the crumpled plastic cup on her way to the plane. Her fingers were no longer reddened and she felt new.

She had an aisle seat in the back of the cabin, whereas the others were seated a bit closer to the front.

As she settled, she felt someone grab her elbow. It was Tom. He was blocking the way and she could see a pretty angry-looking man peeking over his shoulder. She gave Tom an asking look.

-I've got a good news - he said.

-And that is? - Lena raised an eyebrow. -You know that all these people are waiting for you to move on?

-Yeah, yeah - he waved his hand. -Sorry, just a minute - he shoot back over his shoulder.

The angry man didn't seem forgiving at all.

-Anyway, you're not going home yet, you're staying in the city.

-W-what, how? They found someone else for replacement?

-Nah, I still gotta go, but I found you a place to stay. Mum is ok with it, I already asked.

-Okaaay, so? - she felt what he had to say just couldn't be good.

-Well, I told Matty about it and he offered to take you in. He and George have a guest bedroom or something, so you should be fine.

Lena just gaped at him.

-You don't need to thank, it's fine - he gave her a comforting pat on the shoulder. -Sorry for all the fuss.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm always grateful for comments, you can also message me on [my tumblr](http://ministryofsillywords.tumblr.com/) to talk about the band, matty/george or headcanons :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> -You’re fucking crazy.  
> -Aren’t you, though? A match made in heaven!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...  
> 1) I am so sorry, it's been ages  
> 2) Thank you to all the people who sent me messages over tumblr, you're the best  
> 3) I went to Rome, took a train to Ostia, sat on the beach and finally finished what I had sitting on my tablet for almost a year.  
> Here it is!

The part of the city George and Matty lived in was subtly posh. The building was either new or freshly renovated and looked more than comfortable enough. It was clear that even though the boys didn’t mean to splash out their money on real estate just yet, they wanted to feel the change in their lives, have some place to hang their ridiculous brand name clothing in and a place to storage the load of their equipment. And that’s what you could see the moment you entered their flat. That it was a double bachelor pad, complete with big bare white-walled spaces, mismatched decorations here and there, copious amounts of tech equipment - both gaming and working and some visible dust in the corners.

The way from Heathrow was long and heavy with awkwardness, so Lena was thankful to get more breathing space, get further away from George.  
She dropped her bags on the light-colored washed out wooden panels.  
She felt majorly out of place in here, but also eager to fit in. Saw it as essential for her own sanity to become a part of the casual flatmate dynamic.  
Matty offered a theatrical hand gesture, completely unaffected by his general tiredness, welcoming her in. She, in turn, made a tiniest bow and straight away sat on the floor with a moan. She needed sleep and she needed it in a more comfortable position than what the plane had to offer.  
-We're gonna have so much fun together, my dear - Matty exclaimed and punctuated it with a wide yawn.  
-Indeed - she nodded, flopping down into a full lie down position.  
George gave them an unimpressed look and headed for his own bed, leaving all the bags in the hallway.

[A week later.]  
The light was seeping into the room through a triangular fragment of the kitchen window that was left uncovered after Matty used a blanket to create a makeshift curtain.  
He got that genius idea after he and Lena crawled back into the apartment early in the morning. It was supposed to shield them from unwelcome, headache-causing sun. It was good thinking but the design itself turned out a bit sloppy.  
George, on the other hand, wasn't thinking forward, didn't take any precautions, didn't offer any help, even though he left the party much earlier. He was probably too preoccupied shagging that damn girl he left with and that Lena absolutely didn't side-eye from where she was star-fishing on the couch, failing to sleep. It's just that was rude of the guest to not even bother to stay for breakfast.  
The breakfast they were eating in that moment, as the sunlight sliding over the dishes abandoned in the sink by Matty the week before, after his attempt of a welcoming dinner, managed to blind all three pairs of their hangover eyes. They groaned in unison, Matty through a mouthful of scrambled eggs he was shoveling in with a certain despair. The sound broke the slightly awkward silence present in the room for quite a while.  
-So, George - Lena offered him a bitter smile, which required real effort. -How was your night?  
-Great, Lena, thanks for your concern. Even though it's actually none of your concern.  
-It's just that you left me with Matty just as he started crying and then puking, just so you could get your dick wet and…  
-Oi, don't drag me into this. Whatever it is, it's between you two. - Matty made a motion in-between them with his greasy fork. - And don't get me wrong Lena but you're overreacting. And possibly violating George's human right to get his dick wet.  
-You must be right about that last one. Isn't that all he ever wanted? - Lena’s voice was acidic.  
-Ok, I've just said that it's between you two but I've got to ask. - Matty’s cutlery dropped on the plate with an empty clink. - What the fuck is going on?

***  
Lena was sitting alone on the tiny balcony, legs hanging down between the bars when Matty joined her, cigarette in hand.  
-So, you’re obviously sulking again.  
Lena easily nodded her head. She was.  
-You know you’ll have to tell me what it is eventually? - he plopped down next to her and passed her the already lit cig. She declined, he shrugged.  
-Yeah, but do I?  
-Definitely. It’s my home, my break and absolutely no offence darling but you’re ruining it a bit.  
He grabbed her knee, anchoring her when he saw her move at his words.  
-I don’t want you gone, I want you all cute and enthusiastic again, on good terms with that moron, whatever he’s done.  
-Firstly, - Lena put her index finger up- it’s not that easy, secondly it’s not like that.  
-Okay, babe, just tell me.  
She stole his cigarette, took a drag and with an exhale of smoke she exclaimed:  
-We’ve been having a bit of a forbidden love affair.  
Matty let out a startled, cut-off laugh.  
-Okay, I’m gonna need a moment to figure out whether you’re joking or not.  
She put her head down on his knee where he was sitting cross-legged.  
-Oh, babe, you’re not joking, are you?- he threaded his fingers through her hair.  
Matty could be surprisingly calming. He was definitely trustworthy. You wanted to tell him things, knowing he wouldn’t judge, only partly because he’s probably done worse, but his personality tended to be quite jittery, unsettling, especially lately.  
\- Well, that’s unfortunate. Inappropriate, even. Very unlike George. Something I would do, actually…  
Lena laughed at that, though nervously.  
-So, what actually happened? What do you mean by that affair of yours?  
Lena felt as if her face was going to burn through Matty’s ripped skinnies. Which she knew was dumb of her as she didn’t feel particularly ashamed of what she did with George. It’s just… it was still new. She was taught that these things are meant to embarrass and she still didn’t manage to change that point of view in her own head.  
-Errmm, he ate my pussy during the pre-show joint time near the end of tour.  
-That’s a sacred time!  
-Yeah, munchies, you know.  
Matty snorted.  
-That’s it, tho?  
-Nah - Lena felt more relaxed now, sure she could indeed talk to someone about this. - Remember when you found me in your room? That bad trip? I kinda threw myself at him - Lena coughed uncomfortably and Matty laughed, interrupting her.  
-Babe, trust me, I know George, you were mostly telling him that the guilt in his guilt-wanks was unnecessary.  
-Wait, wait, wait, what? - Lena looked up at him with her eyes wide. Matty just shook his head and stubbed out the cigarette, immediately squirming to get another one from the pack in his backpocket.  
-That’s a whole other conversation, babe. Back to your trip, hm?  
-Yeah, so after I didn’t throw myself at him he fingered me with you in the room and then jerked off on my butt in the shower the morning after.  
Matty whistled in a sort of thoughtful manner. Which was unsettling.  
-Oh god, now that I’ve said it out loud it sounds really bad.  
-It does, but I’ve heard worse from George.  
-Yeah, should I get excited?  
-Depends why he’s so mad at you.  
Matty got up and helped Lena up with a questioning look. She shrugged heavily. Their balcony break was over. Matty had to get back to working with George and Lena had to get back to the reality in which George was still ignoring her except for an occasional stare full of disdain.  
-He’s got issues with Tom and with my age and I guess I’m also not sure about this but… - Lena cut off the rambling with a sigh. - I like the dynamic, I like what we’re doing, even though it’s not the most sensible thing to do. It’s just fun, you know? And I do like him, but I’m realistic about his, it’s not like I’m gonna go crazy. Do you think it’s wrong?  
-Eh… - Matty rubbed his face, suddenly looking very tired with life. - You know about Gemma, I’ve been through this. Is it right? Not entirely. Is it sensible? Definitely not. Is it worth it? Duh…! I’ve learnt to treat the rules more like guidelines and, well, me and her are both fine. You can make your own decisions.  
Lena smiled hesitantly.  
-I’ll help you with that idiot, don’t worry.  
-Thank you, dear - Lena smacked a sweet kiss on his cheek.  
-But Tom can never know!  
***  
They got it carefully planned out. After the supper they settled in front of the TV, George in the armchair opposite of them. Matty put on The Lobster. They had white wine with frozen strawberries thrown in the glasses. A threat. Lena melted them against her tongue, feeling it stiffen and waited.  
George would always get bored with whatever film they were watching. His eyes would drift away from the screen. This way he could easily see. They just had to wait.  
The movie turned out pretty bizarre which added up to the abstract feeling created by wine and by the stupidity of what they were going to do. Lena was fully aware of how childish she was still being but it was the holidays for her - she couldn’t say she cared much.  
She heard a soft clink. They were maybe half an hour into the movie. George has put down his glass on the floor and reached for his phone instead. She squeezed Matty’s wrist. It was time.  
He stirred and after a bit she felt his smile against her throat. He was sitting behind her - now pretty much wrapped around her, Lena propped up against his chest.  
She kept sneaking gazes towards George - both checking up on him to plan a next move and admiring him. He was laid out comfortably, his body long and toned, one arm up around his head - muscles subtle but visible.  
At first it just made her mouth water in anticipation but then it also reminded her of something. What Matty said back on the tourbus, they way he looked while saying it. “...so big, innit? All pretty and muscly, could do anything to you if he wanted.” He looked like his mouth was watering, too.  
Same thing when they were planning this scheme - “Everyone thinks nothing can really move him, nothing can touch him, that he’s like a fucking stone. There’s a way though - jealousy. You should see him, it gets hilarious. Well, you will, innit…”  
She wondered if she was the only person George would be getting jealous about. If there was something people forgot to mention to her - it just made it more fun. It could potentially make her more wet at some point.  
Wet. She felt Matty’s tongue on her neck. A pleasant sensation. It didn’t electrify her the way George did but a soft melty buttery feeling was definitely there, in the pit of her stomach. She was subconsciously comparing them again. George’s angry energy and Matty’s teasing.  
She dipped in - turned her head and caught his mouth with hers. He opened up and her cheeks warmed up with wine and with the kiss. She turned around in his arms, hooking hers around his neck comfortably.  
-Wait - he murmured into her lips. - Put your head the other way…  
He reached out, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled. His face was so close it almost made Lena crossed eyed.  
-This way he can see you, no interruptions to the show.  
-If he sees.  
Matty smirked.  
-If he doesn’t we’ll have to go with something heavier…  
-Wh-  
He didn’t let her finish, shutting her up with another kiss.  
The characters of the movie, up until now muting out with conversations everything that Matty and Lena were saying, suddenly went silent. The scene must have been a tense one, an important one. And so was the scene in the reality.  
The soft sounds of their mouths connecting ringed out in the room. There was a shift in the atmosphere, you could almost feel the tension under your fingertips.  
Lena did - the tension in Matty’s shoulders - like he was aware he was tiptoeing on the edge of something really messy, ready to fall in with all of the consequences. His lips slid on her skin all the way down to her throat where he bit down making her moan and at the same he slid one of his hands under her top. The other hand rucked her skirt up, her underwear probably in plain view.  
She heard and felt George before she saw him, a quiet growl and a strong grip on her forearm, forcing her back and away from Matty.  
-What! - she exclaimed, not really a question, anger boiling within her despite things going just like planned. His face was like a mirror - same feeling she felt, maybe with added betrayal.  
His chest was moving fast, like he just stopped running but he was quiet.  
-I want to talk, can we talk?  
-Now? - Lena raised an eyebrow, challenging him.  
His jaw locked.  
-Yes, now is the perfect moment.  
-Alright then - she shrugged with perfect indifference and got up, flattening out her rucked up skirt. She felt almost feverish.  
George went straight for his bedroom door and she followed him in.  
It was actually a first time she was in there, a completely new territory. A place George would often disappear in, often angry, often at her.  
There wasn’t a big difference between it and the rest of the apartment or, for instance, Matty’s bedroom - big, white, empty except for the mess, big mattress with grey sheets, a standing lamp on the floor next to it, a big plain mirror on the opposite wall and a desk by the window.  
Admittedly with some reluctance, she sat on the edge of the mattress. The sheets were fresh. He was lucky they didn’t smell like that girl, she thought.  
George stopped in front of her - his arms crossed on his chest and his face angry as, well, always.  
-What’s all this?  
-We’re in love, Georgie, don’t be mad - she deadpanned.  
The look on his face said ‘I’m waiting’. She sighed.  
-It’s a show designed just for you. I know how much you like looking at me being a slut. Wasn’t it just glorious? A low bait that worked just fine because I’m where I wanted to be. And you care.  
-You’re fucking crazy.  
-Aren’t you, though? A match made in heaven! - Lena exclaimed.  
-B-babe…- he hesitated and started pacing in a circle round the mattress, avoiding various mysterious objects scattered here and there with caution. - We’ve already talked about this, remember?  
-You mean that drunken conversation? Complete bullshit - she laid back, suddenly convinced another one of her schemes would work.  
-Was It? I'm pretty sure that conclusion was logical.  
-That conclusion we came to feeling constantly chased by Tom. He's not here anymore, but we're still going crazy!  
George raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything.  
-What I'm saying is… Let's let ourselves go for now and when I'm gone the secret will be gone too. Nobody but Matty knows and he's done worse.  
-I don't know…  
Lena pulled herself up and loosely grabbed one of George's hands.  
-But I do. It's the only way - why argue all the time when we can put that energy elsewhere? And you can stop settling for groupies…  
George laughed softly at the remark. He finally moved his hand under hers and stroked his thumb down her palm slowly.  
-Aren't you a groupie?  
Lena shrugged and pulled him closer to her till he was standing between her legs.  
-Admit it's a good idea and you can call me whatever you want to.  
-Uh-huh, I'm still mad about that stunt you pulled back there, though - he motioned to the living room.  
She rolled her eyes - he honestly thought he could have an upper hand in here.  
-Poor thing, how about I blow you and then you can come on my tits?  
George groaned and covered his face. Rubbed one of his big hands over it. When he slid it down the tension was already there.  
-Do you know how ridiculous you sound? - George asked, sounding completely in love. Lena wanted to laugh, but she couldn’t utter a sound.  
Her cheek was burning hot under his cold fingers, so was her mouth around his thumb pressing down on her tongue. Her eyes followed his other hand as it zipped down his jeans.  
-Go on then - his voice was unwavering and calm. She never heard it be like that. She barely registered herself reaching out to pull his underwear down.  
Not many things felt as good as the overwhelming embarrassment when she closed her mouth around his dick.  
She breathed out through her nose. Her stomach trembled. She balled her left hand up in her skirt. Her right hand creeped under it towards her soaked through panties.  
-Nuh-uh, wait till it hurts - George tutted and his voice was breathier than before but still full of this hypnotizing calmness.  
He pushed her head down a little and she gave out a choking sound to which he petted her cheek.  
Tears collected in the corners of her eyes but she wasn't sure if it was due to the dick sliding into her mouth or to the embarrassment induced numbness.  
After some time she realised George's breath picked up and he slid out and fumbled for the edge of her top. He pulled it up with her bra and came on her, her nipples immediately tightening in the cool air.  
George fell to his knees and pulled her into a kiss.  
-F-fuck - Lena whined into his mouth. - It hurts, it really hurts.  
-Come on, baby - he put her thighs around his where he was kneeling down on the floor by the mattress. He reached out and forcefully pulled her underwear to the side.  
-Sit down now - he whispered.  
She complied and as two of his fingers slid inside her, his thumb settled on her clit. The relief was so great she whined pathetically into his neck, her arm looping around it to give herself some leverage.  
-Fuck yourself, Lena - he laughed and possibly licked her cheek, she wasn’t sure.  
-I. Hate. You. - She panted, moving on his hand with desperate intent. She grabbed his fingers and pressed them firmly against the clitoris. Meow-like moans escaped her without a particular rhythm.  
-If you could only see yourself… - she wasn't fully aware of George as a person at that point, she sensed him as a constellation of points in which their bodies touched or came close to touching. His words had to force themselves through the warm fog she felt around her body that was however probably composed of his breath. His breath is what made her aware of what he was saying - Such a filthy slut.  
She sped up, clenching her eyes with a half-sob, half-whimper.  
When she opened them she saw herself - pink cheeks, messy hair, wild eyes - in the mirror over George's shoulder and it felt so utterly dirty she came.  
She slumped in George's arms and he carefully laid her down. Her top was still bundled up under her arms, so she got rid of it and of the skirt and ruined pants. She got comfortable, stretched out, sprawled naked across the bed.  
George looked at her in awe.  
-You absolute jailbait.  
-You absolute wanker - she echoed him mockingly. -Put your dick away.  
-You weren't like that a minute ago - he pointed out but did so and laid down next to her gathering her sweaty body into an embrace.  
-You know, -George started - I changed my mind, I like the stunt.  
-Matty was eager to help - Lena replied.- Probably to confuse you more, you know, so you could be jealous of both of us - she laughed into his chest.  
\- Duh, -George said. - All he ever does is confusing me.  
Oh, Lena thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always - thank you for reading, my inbox is wide open and welcoming.  
> I do not condone fucking your mate's underage sister!


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